Boot Camp

Today was my first day of Fitness Boot Camp. OMG. I am so out of shape it isn't even funny. I have been in such denial. I had a great 4 or 5 months the end of last year, beginning of this year...but it has been to long since I have been in the gym or really doing a regular workout. Every since I hurt my back in April I haven't gotten back into working out. My body has regressed-even farther than I was when I started working out before. I am the LARGEST I have ever been. I am almost HALF BODY FAT. That just makes me want to puke- I won't b/c it is just gross. :)

As we were getting weighed and measured, I realized that my thigh is bigger than a few of the girls' stomach measurements that were doing the camp. (although they were teenagers doing the camp b/c their track coaches told them too...but STILL!) We did a fitness assessment today. That consisted first of a warm-up. A 'slow jog around the track'. Um, first of all, let me tell you this in a park...in the HOT AS HELL FLORIDA weather. Granted- it was 7am...but it was effin' hot

I was sweatin' before we started. The track is about the size of regular track..but is in a park. on hills. I had to start walking about 3/4 of the way. ugh. I look back to about 6 months ago when I was jogging a mile and then working out for 30-40 minutes. WTF happened to me? We then did real sit ups I did 20. yeah- 20 in 90 seconds. Are you kidding me? Whose body is this? Whose boobs are these flinging around practically causing a black eye?!?!?! When I was training I was doing intervals and getting 25-30 in the 90 seconds. At least I got in the double digits with the push ups. Barely. 10. 10 traditional push ups in 90 seconds. Mortified is what I was. Horrified. Chagrinned that I can't continue living how I am. Scared about my health. My body is to out of shape. I have to be in good health to do this. There is to much riding on it...not just money- but more importantly OUR FUTURE CHILDREN!!!

When we get pregnant I don't want to miscarry, or deliver early b/c my blood pressure spikes....I don't want to have anything over my head that I could later think I could have prevented.

The final thing was that we had to run a mile. This was the wake up. It took me 14.08 minutes to do that. It was embarrassing. Is this is same body that did the half marathon (13.1 miles fyi) 4 years ago?!? Was that really 4 years ago!? They timed us- we all started together, and you ended in the same spot. I was 3rd to the last..I don't revel in the fact that there were two sweet girls behind me. I feel their shame. I rounded the last corner to run the last 2 blocks- I had to chant to myself "babies, easier labor, babies, easier labor"... well you get the point! I was almost crying by the time I finished b/c that was when all the feelings I talked about earlier came flooding in. Perhaps it was a catharsis. I don't know All I know is that my heart is hurting. So are my damn calves. LOL!!!

90% of the 20 or so people (okay, someone smart do the damn math- my brain is pooped) in the class were returning campers. The last camp was 10 days ago. They did awesome-I felt like the donkey that showed up on accident to the champion horse show.

I am going to stick with this- I have to...I got it for 100 bucks at a silent auction...it normally is 350 for 1st time campers. :) The BIGGEST hurdle will be my diet. Lance is going to be my biggest road block. I have thrown away chips, cheez-its, etc. I can't have that stuff in the house. I will eat it when I am hungry. I really hope he supports me. I have had him read my manuel- he already called me out on my enchilada...although it was made with low carb whole wheat, chicken, etc. :) I ate a salad instead of corn. Baby steps people. Baby steps.

They gave us a great manual, so that will help. I have also got BACK into entering my stuff online. That hopefully will help. I am also going to Map My Run. That is a pretty cool website. I need to do another post about this weekend. :) Had friends down, and it was great. Today is Lance's b'day!! YEAH! We did the b'day cake, presents, etc Friday with a surprise b'day party...so I can avoid the cake today. Thank goodness..

Love to all!

MUAH!